


Tenhimi: Before The Game

by wlwchiaki



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Danganronpa, DanganronpaV3 - Fandom, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Abuse, Angst, CSA, Canon Lesbian Character, Canon Lesbian Relationship, Eating Disorders, Emetophobia, F/F, POV Female Character, POV First Person, POV Lesbian Character, Pregame Danganronpa, Useless Lesbians, pregame
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:29:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23620852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wlwchiaki/pseuds/wlwchiaki
Summary: Updates once a weekHimiko has been dealt a bad hand in life- barely living off her abusive father's funds, being bullied on the daily.Tenko is an insecure girl who falls in love easily- and when she falls, she never gets back up.This story is told before the events of Danganronpa V3.
Relationships: Chabashira Tenko & Yumeno Himiko, Chabashira Tenko/Yumeno Himiko, Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Comments: 4
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter One

I felt a weight on top of me when I woke up, and just now I'm realizing what it is. It smells like alcohol and the couch beneath me is ratty and scratching my skin. The man on top of me is dead asleep, so I'm able to maneuver out from under him quite easily.

I immediately feel grimy and disgusting. 

"I've gotta get clean..." I mutter to myself. I run as fast as possible to the bathroom while keeping quiet and step into the shower. I crank the faucet, hoping for it's cold jets to hit me, but instead only a little trickle comes out. He must have forgotten to pay the water bill again.

I can shower at school. That works. I step into the mirror's reflection. What greets me back I don't recognize, I never will recognize. Pale skin. Bloodshot maroon eyes. Shoulder length tangled red hair. I painfully brush out my hair with my fingers and put on my school uniform- a long grey sweater and a blue skirt with knee high white socks. I can't find the red ribbon that goes around the collar, so I decide to I can pick one up at school instead.

I sneak into the kitchen and look through the pantry and fridge: only condiments and a few stale saltines. You've gotta go shopping today, Himiko. I eat the crackers, leaving a few for the man on the couch. 

I grab my backpack and my house keys and leave, locking the door behind me. It's freezing outside, and there's a heavy fog that has set over everything. I look up at the sky and I can't see any blue. Even the sun itself is dulled.

As I swallow the last of my crackers, suddenly I'm reminded of what happened last night and am overcome with nausea. 

"Shit..." I mumble, swaying and hitting the side of someone's house. Before I know what's happening, I'm throwing up my crackers and everything I had eaten and drunken the night before, which wasn't much so I'm left heaving up nothing for half a minute. Everything sways before me. I feel disgusting. I feel so dirty. I have to wash all this dirt away. And for that to happen, I have to get to school.

So I keep walking. I pull out a book from my backpack with shaky hands- my favorite book of all time. "The mysteries of magic and the occult" By Aito Asahi. I've read it probably 20 times- I think I may have the entire book memorized at this point.

There's something wonderful about not knowing something, about something being magic. Something unexplainable. Even if it's not for long, I love escaping into the world of magic and occult. Whenever something bad is happening to me, I just imagine myself as a strong and powerful mage from another era. It distracts me.

A shadow is casted over my book. It's my school, Sakura High School. It was named after the woman from the first danganronpa game that died.

I head over to the gym quickly and put my stuff in my locker. I glance around to make sure no one is in the locker room with me, and then take off my clothes quickly and run into the shower. I pull the curtains shut as tight as possible.

I turn on the faucet and let the hot torrents of water slowly remove the grime and dirt I had felt on my body. I let out a minuscule sigh of pleasure and wash myself thoroughly, before wiping myself down with a towel and exiting the shower stall with the towel tied around my chest. 

I'm about to grab my clothes from my locker when I hear a gasp.

"What- what the hell are you doing here?! There's another hour before school starts!" Someone shouts behind me. I clutch my towel closer to my body and spin around, eyes wide. Oh no. This isn't good.

It's Kaede Akamatsu. Anyone who goes to Sakura high school knows to fear and respect her, otherwise you're dead meat.

She has chin length blonde hair with two longer pieces in the front. She has purplish eyes that are always narrowed. Usually she wears the school's sailor uniform, except her's is cut so her skirt is much shorter. She's incredibly cute. She's chubby and has adorable freckles- but her personality is so vicious and sharp you could cut with it. She's also wearing just a towel, same as me.

"I said what the hell are you doing here, magic girl!" She shouts, storming up to me and grabbing my towel to pull me closer to her. She's pretty short, but I'm shorter so she has leverage.

"I just needed to shower..." Her hand on my chest is making me uncomfortable and I desperately want to wiggle out. I realize that she wouldn't be here to shower unless she didn't have water at home either. That's strange, I though she would have been rich or something due to how mean she is. Guess your class doesn't dictate your personality.

"You tell anyone I was here, and you're dead." She shoves me away, face red. She gestures over to the baseball bat she constantly carries around, presumably as a threat. I watch her strut away into the showers. I shut my eyes and try to control my breathing. It was Kaede who touched me like that, not him. It was just Kaede, the most vicious and meanest bully of the school. Trying not to panic, I put on my regular clothes.

After that I find a supply closet I can hide in and read my magic book until the first bell rings, signifying it's study hall. I make my way to the library and sign the attendance sheet.

"Where's your ribbon, Ms.Yumeno?" I hear a voice say. I glance up to see my teacher, Ms.Todaka.

"I couldn't find it..." I mumble to the ground, ashamed. I was going to go to the school lost and found to borrow one, but after the Kaede incident I was too shaken up to do anything of the sort.

"Sorry, where?!" She shouts this time. The library goes silent and I feel a hundred different eyes of a hundred teenagers on me.

"I couldn't find it, ma'm!" I say louder, hesitantly staring her back in the eyes. She makes a tsking sound with her tongue and pulls out a ruler. Everyone gasps and starts whispering to each other, but I am filled with a mounding sensation of dread.

I shut my eyes tight and hold out my wrists, bracing for the pain. It comes, and keeps coming until it's over. I open my eyes and my wrists are bruised and bloody. It's okay, though. I've had to deal with worse. I slowly walk to a computer, still feeling all eyes on me. However when I sit down the conversations around me explode once again into the drone of chatter.

I hate my life. I hate everything right now. I wake up, foodless, dirty, get harrassed in the locker room, and then whipped on my wrists with a ruler until a bleed. And it's not just today. Every single day I'm miserable and bloody and dirty. I should just kill mys-

"Are you okay?" A voice next to me says. I face towards my right to see a concerned looking girl with greenish blackish hair and green eyes and-

And she's beautiful. There's just something about her. She's not particularly gorgeous or tall or busty- she's just really pretty. She has a small birthmark right below her mouth and a small slit in her eyebrow. Her hair is loose and falls over her shoulders like the way a waterfall would fall into a river. She's chubby like Kaede, and her cheeks are round and accentuate her eyes perfectly.

"N-yeh" What the hell did I just say? It was like a cross between no and yeah. I find my face reddening.

"Nyeh? That's so cute! What an adorable catchphrase!" She giggles. Her laughter is contagious and I find myself smiling.

"Y-yes, I'm okay." However right as I say that, blood from my wrists splatter onto the table.

"Oh no! Um, here, I have some bandages. Can I put them on you?" She asks, tilting her head slightly to the side when doing so. I nod, intrigued by this kind girl on such an unkind day.

She pulls out cotton and gauze from her bag and puts the cotton on my wounds, then wraps the bandages tightly around the rest of my wrist.

"This'll do for now, but please see a nurse when you get the chance!" She says sternly, patting down my hand. Her touches are so much softer and nicer.

"Nyeh," Why am I saying that all of a sudden? "Thank you. What's your name?" She pouts. Oh no, did I say something wrong?

"Himiko, we've had like 3 classes together since junior high! I guess you never noticed me?" She looks a little hurt, like I really should know her. I guess I'm too absorbed in my book or daydreaming to notice her. Or anyone for that matter. I don't have a single friend at this school. I spend all class spacing out and all day after school working, making dinner, or at the library. There's no time for friends when you have a full time job of being a loner, I guess.

"It's okay! We never formally introduced ourselves," She must have noticed my uncomfortableness. "My name is Tenko Chabashira, nice to meet you."

"I'm Himiko Yumeno. It's nice to meet you too." The bell rings, interrupting our conversation.

"Damn. Well, see you later Himiko!"

Tenko stands up and walks out of the library. She seems to be a good 6 inches taller than me- but she slouches when she walks and kind of hides herself. She seems... insecure. 

I float through my classes, one by one, in a sleepy manner until lunchtime. I can't afford food so I just end up at a table full of geeky kids who I barely know. 

I was so absorbed in my book that i didn't even notice that someone was calling my name.

"Himikooooo!" Someone is tapping my arm.

"Huh?"

"Did you do the homework in science? Shuichi is wondering." It's a boy with purple-ish hair, gesturing over to a shy looking boy wearing a hat and holding a monokuma plush. That must be Shuichi. The names come rushing back. Right. Shuichi and Kokichi.

"Yeah. Here." I hand them the homework, and Kokichi starts signing to Shuichi, who signs back. Huh, that's weird. I didn't know Shuichi is deaf. I really should start paying attention in class more. Whatever, says my inner voice. Not like you'll know them for much longer.

I watch curiously at their silent conversation for a few seconds. Kokichi seems to be completely fluent in sign language, and Shuichi answers just as quickly. 

"Woah woah woah WOAH you guys, no gang symbols in our good school cafeteria!" Taunts a voice. I look above the two boys to see... a monster. I pale, and I'm about to scurry away from the action like usual, but another monster pushes me back onto my seat with force.

"You're not escaping again, magic girl." Kaede snickers, spinning on her heel and joining the other bully.

"Kaito, how should we punish these dirty gang members?" She says, resting her head on the shoulder of the taller, purple haired boy.

"Leave us alone, guys. You know Shuichi is nonverbal." Oh, so he just doesn't talk. He's not deaf. 

People in the cafeteria are starting to stare at my table now. Think, Himiko, think! How can I get out of this situation without getting hurt? I glance around at the table of the geeky kids I sit with. There's this girl with blonde hair and a short nervous looking boy- Miu and Keebo, I think. They're robotics kids. Not going to be much help.

There's Shuichi, who is petrified with fear and holding onto his Danganronpa stuffed animal for dear life. No help at all. Kokichi looks like he's ready to fight them- but he couldn't be 2 inches taller than me and is incredibly skinny. Kaede and Kaito are both stronger and taller- and Kaito has a baseball bat he carries around everywhere.

That only leaves me. I gulp and stand up, my entire body shaking like a leaf.

"L-l-leave them alone!" I shout, but it comes out more like a squeak. I may not be as strong or tall as the bullies- but I've had plenty of practice at dodging people who want to hurt me.

"I think this redhead needs a lesson too, Kaede. Hand over any money you got, ya hear?" Kaito says, strutting over to me, and bending down with a menacing look in his eyes.

"I don't have any money!" I tell him. "Please leave!" I swear he looks nervous for a second, but then his eyes are filled with that familiar bloodlust.

"Himi-" Kokichi starts, sounding worried, but Kaede interrupts him.

"Fine, it's fine Kaito. We can teach her a different lesson." She lifts up Kaito's baseball bat, and I hear a collective gasp. I can see even the teachers watching in interest instead of intervening. I'm petrified. I can't seem to make my body move. Well, I might as well just let my life end here.

"Do it." Another gasp.

"Kill me. I don't care." It's like my brain is on autopilot. I'm completely detached from the situation, like I'm floating above it all.

Kaede lowers the bat slightly, eyes showing concern. 

"Wha-" Kaito grunts, interrupting her. 

"Agh! Fine, I will!" He yanks the bat out of the blonde's hands and swings it down upon my head.

CRACK!

The last thing I hear is someone yelling my name.

Stay strong, I think to myself. You're Himiko the great mage... you can do this... Himiko the great.... the great...

....

....

....


	2. Chapter Two

"Ngh..." I murmur. I try and open my eyes, but everything is incredibly blurry. I can see the shadows of people above me, but I have no idea who they are. Someone from above me leans down and picks me up. I feel myself moving through the air, and out of the cafeteria. Slowly I'm starting to come to my senses, and the person holding me's face comes registers in my consciousness.

It's Shuichi, looking as timid as usual. He seems serious and determined though, set on where he's going.

"Shuichi, wait up!" A voice behind him says, so I shut my eyes again, curious of what's happening.

I feel Shuichi's pace pick up.

"Shuichi, damnit, come here. It was on accident."

He kind of shifts me around a bit, trying to free a hand. Presumably he's trying to sign to the person behind him but to no avail. He makes a small exasperated noise.

"I was just blowing off steam man! Kaede was pissing me off, and I needed some coin! That girl was just in the way."

I can feel Shuichi's heart beat quicken. He breathes in like he's going to say something a few times before, surprisingly, he does.

"B-b-bullshit." He says in a very soft voice. I can tell he's struggling to speak.

"I'm taking her to a hosp-, I'm taking her to a hospital, Kaito." 

Wait, so Shuichi somehow knows Kaito? Knows him well enough to speak to him? I have no idea what's going on.

"Oh you little-" I hear Kaito start to walk faster, and I decide to try and divert the attention from Shu by directing the attention to me. I make a small whimpering noise and inhale sharply. I hear Kaito freeze.

"Damnit, just take her to the damn hospital already." Kaito says after a few moments of silence. He then storms away, muttering quietly to himself.

After a few seconds of Shuichi still walking with me, breathing fast and heartbeat rapid, I open my eyes.

"Shuichi." He stops walking and widens his eyes.

"Put me down, I'm fine I think. He didn't hit me very hard." I tell him, and he obliges, still panicky- looking.

He points to his ears, and then his mouth. 

"Did I hear you talking?" He nods, telling me that's what he was asking.

"Yeah. It's no biggie though. I won't tell anyone, not like I have any friends to tell."

There's a moment of awkward silence. That was kind of a weird thing to say, I realize. Stupid Himiko.

I want to ask him about that conversation, but I have a feeling he won't talk again. That talking to Kaito seemed like a lot of work. I pull out a sheet of paper from my pocket and a pen, and hand it to him.

"Can you tell me why you don't like to talk?" I ask him curiously. He writes down something on the paper and hands it to me.

"I've got really bad social anxiety, and high functioning autism. It's enough work to go to school, much less talk. I get asked this a lot." Well that makes sense. I hand the paper back to him.

"Okay, thanks for telling me. Um, and what was that conversation with Kaito earlier? You don't have to tell me if it's too personal." He sighs, writes something down, and hands the paper back.

"It's fine. Kaito and I are kind of old friends, and I've been trying to get him to stop bullying people and being so mean. He used to be nice, but one day he just changed."

"Oh. I'm sorry." I say. I give him the paper back, and he starts writing something else.

"If you're okay, I've got to go to class." I nod, and he starts walking away.

"Wait!" Just say it Himiko. Just say it. My mouth opens, and I try and will myself to speak, but instead I just make a weird voice cracking sound.

"Never mind." He looks at me oddly and then walks around the corner and out of view. Dang it!

I just wanted to ask to be friends.

I bury my face into my palms and sit there, blind to the world.

This is useless. Why am I even here? I only have today left, and I'm spending it at dumb school.

"I'll get home and start preparing." I tell myself. When I stand up I feel a bit woozy, but when I touch my head there's no blood. Only a minuscule bump. I make my way to the front hall and walk out to the cloudy day. It's cooled since this morning, and a chilly wind bores straight through my uniform.

I start walking home, eyes glued to the ground. I would read my book, but I left it somewhere in the lunch room. Oh well. No point in it anymore.

Suddenly I feel another human run into me. I look up in surprise to see a girl with long greenish hair in a ponytail, wearing leggings and a t- shirt.

"Tenko?"

"Ah! Himiko! Um, hi!" She says nervously, with a half smile on her face. She immediatley backs away from me, pulling down her shirt sleeves.

"What are you doing?" I ask her.

"I usually go running during lunch hour." She blushes and pulls down her ponytail, so her hair falls into a thick glossy curtain, almost covering her face.

"No need to be so insecure." I say tiredly. I just want to go home and do this thing.

"What?" She says. She looks confused. I'm never going to see her again, so I might as well be honest.

"You're chubby, and you're insecure. That's dumb. Being chubby just means you should be proud your family has enough to eat. And you're already good looking so it doesn't matter." Silence from her. She's just staring at me, shocked.

"Sorry but I've got to go." I start to push past her, but she softly puts her hand on my shoulder.

"No one's ever been honest to me like that." Tenko blushed.

"Can we be friends? I need more honest people in my life." She laughs. I can tell she's still a bit shocked.

"Friends..." I murmer quietly.

"Yeah!"

Her hand feels warm on my shoulder, and somehow i'm not recoiling from her touch like I usually do.

"S-sure..."

She smiles her crazily infectious smile, which makes me do the same.

"Well friend, wanna skip the rest of school today? You look kind of tired."

I nod sleepily, still stunned from the turn events. I was going to go home and kill myself before she showed up, so I this is a major plus. I feel my knees buckle and almost fall into the pretty girl in front of me.

"Ah, Himiko!" She holds onto me tightly.

"Or I can take you home so you can sleep...?" She says nervously.

"Not my house..." She's so warm. Like a teddy bear.

"Ah... here, I got you."

I feel my body being hoisted into the air. Tenko slings me onto her back and starts walking in the opposite direction of my house. I feel warm, and safe, so I find myself drifting off in her arms peacefully.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be sure to check out my wattpad and twitter also at wlwchiaki! Please tell me any comments or criticism you have on my work, and I hope you enjoyed this chapter.


	3. Chapter Three

It's been a few weeks since my near death experience, and Tenko and I have been spending every day after school with each other. I can't say I'm not still, well, suicidal, but she distracts me from thinking darkly.

She's unlike any person I had ever met. She doesn't push too much when asking if I'm okay- and respects me when I don't tell her things, like why I collapsed on her that one day in exhaustion. She listens to me as well, truly interested in what I'm saying. Tenko even likes listening to me ramble on about the occult and magic, which I didn't even dream of another person listening to me talk about. We even started eating lunch together, and she protects me and the others at my table when Kaede and Kaito try to bother us.

Today the cafeteria is serving sakura mochi along with the normal food, since Hinamatsuri is tomorrow and we have school off. Tenko comes over to my table holding her tray, and I notice she brought two of the pink mochi on her plate. She sits down next to me and slides both onto my paper plate on which I only had some oyster crackers and rice- some food I had bought from the market near my house.

"Nyeh," for some reason, I couldn't stop saying that now, "Thanks, but don't you want one?" I ask her, carefully peeling off the plastic on the mochi.

"Nah!" She waves her hand dismissively. "I never really liked sakura mochi, hishi mochi is wayyy better!"

"Really?" Kokichi interrupts out of nowhere. "Sakura is totally better. Hishi mochi is so sticky and gross." Shuichi nudges him and signs something angrily.

"Shuichi agrees." Shuichi hits him lightly, signaling that he definitely doesn't agree.

"You're all wrong. Shiro-zaki is the best girl's day treat." This girl Miu says. She's usually a quiet, nerdy girl who only talks with her friend Keebo, and this is the first time she has actually talked to us.

"Shiro-zaki?"

"Are you crazy?"

"Shira-zaki is good, but it's nothing compared to the mochis." I finally say, breaking the argument.

"Hm. Well can we all agree that the treats on Hinamatsuri are way better than the treats on Tango no Sekku?" Kokichi retorts.

There's a pause as everyone thinks for a second.

"True, true." We all mutter. 

Chewing on the sweet pink dessert, I sweep my eyes around the lunchroom. I'm constantly on the alert for Kaede and Kaito. I lock eye contact with Shuichi for a split second and realize he's doing the same thing. 

I'm not terrified of them or anything, I just don't want Tenko or the others to get hurt. I realized after Kaito hit me that the worst thing they can do is physical pain, which I have a fairly high tolerance of. Well, maybe not, but I am used to it.

I'm finishing my second sakura mochi when the bell rings, so I stuff the rest into my mouth and grab my bag.

"So, Himiko, are you doing anything tomorrow for Hinamatsuri?" Tenko says timidly. She's fiddling with the strap of her bag as we walk.

"I was planning on going to the doll floating, and then going to the festival to get free stuff."

"You're not spending it with your family?" She asks. She tends to tilt her head to the side when she talks, like a puppy. Oh, right, answer her question Himiko.

"No." I snap. She looks taken aback.

"Sorry. Um, what are you doing?"

"Well my parents are out of town for work, so I was wondering if maybe we could go to the doll floating and the festival together?" She asks, smiling sweetly.

"Yes! I mean... if you want to. That's what friends do right?" Her face drops.

"Right... friends. I'll meet you at the park after school." She heads off quickly into her next class. 

What did I say wrong...?

Hinamatsuri- Girl's Day, it's a holiday in Japan

Tango no Sekku- Boy's Day, another holiday in Japan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out my twitter and wattpad also at wlwchiaki. Leave me comments and criticism please! Thanks for reading!


	4. Chapter Four

The next day, I go to the park and sit on a bench to wait for Tenko. For some reason I’m… nervous? I feel all sweaty and clammy, and I keep glancing around and anxiously looking for her. I’m wearing a kimono from when I was super little, back when my mom was still around. I’m surprised it still fits me, although it makes sense since I’ve been the same height since 5th grade.

It’s pink with sakura flowers on it, and I actually quite like it, although I haven’t used it in the longest time. I notice a girl sitting on the empty playground, wearing a purple kimono. I recognize that blonde bob of hair- it’s Kaede! I freeze up. What should I do? She’s looking away from me, but what if she notices me? 

What is she doing? She’s wiping her face with the sleeve of her kimono, and I hear this soft sort of whimpering noise. She’s crying…? Suddenly I feel hands cover my eyes, and I cover my chest as a reflex.

“Huh??” I squeak, kind of scared. 

“Guess whooo?” A bubbly voice says, and I immediately know who.

“Tenko!” She takes her hands off of me and I stand up and spin around.

She’s wearing a green kimono, made of shimmery fabric that has vines and leaves on it. Her hair is loose, waist length and curled at the ends. She’s wearing eyeliner and has on pink lipstick. She looks… gorgeous. Her soft green eyes seem even more accentuated with the green of her kimono. I feel even more nervous now.

“Ready to go to the festival?” She asks. I nod quickly, too choked up to say anything. I feel strangely hot and I have to keep wiping my palms on my kimono.

“Hinamatsuri is my favorite holiday because no guys are around, haha!” She giggles and takes my hand in hers. 

“Woah, Himiko, your face is super red! Are you feeling alright?” She asks worriedly, and tilts her head like she always does when asking a question.

“Yes… It’s just a bit hot, that’s all.” 

“Oh, yeah, totally.” We start walking towards the central square, still holding hands.

“Ah… you look, um, really pretty tonight, Tenko.” I stammer out, turning my head so she won’t see my blush. 

“Th-thank you! You look really pretty as well!” She says. I look up at her and notice that her cheeks are red as well, and she’s looking away.

Wait. We’re both blushing right now, and we’re holding hands, and Tenko got sad when I said we were friends. We’re also going to the Hinamatsuri festival together and not with any other friends or our families.

“Are-are we on a date?!” I say, astonished. ...Did I say that out loud?

Tenko nervously scratches the back of her head.

“Man, Himiko. You don’t take cues well, huh?”

“No… not at- not at all.” I say, incredibly embarrassed. I’m still too nervous to look at her. She takes her hand away. 

I feel terrible. I didn’t know that Tenko liked me… like that.

But the real question I’m wondering is… do I like her back?

As we walk, I think about all the times I’ve spent with Tenko till now. Kind, caring Tenko who carried me to her house when I almost passed out. Tenko who gave me her sakura mochi and walks me to class every day. Tenko, with her soft eyes and her great hugs and protective character. Tenko, ranting about annoying boys while we sit together and do face masks in her room. Tenko. Tenko. Tenko.

“Tenko…? I murmur quietly. I look over to her, and I notice how even though we’re walking about a foot apart from each other, she looks a thousand miles away. Her brow is furrowed and she’s staring sadly into the distance.

“Tenko!” I shout, and jump in front of her. She stops abruptly.

“Huh??” She says, snapping out of it. Her eyes are wide with confusion.

“Don’t be stupid! Of course we’re on a date and I like you too!” I state loudly. People around us are looking at us strangely, but I don’t care.I see her face go from confused, to shocked, and then she smiles.

“Haha! Yes! I like you too!” She hugs me tightly, and I hug her back. I burrow my face into her soft shoulder. When she pulls away, we stand with our faces a few inches apart for a few seconds. She’s breathing softly. My heart is thumping like crazy. I haven’t felt like this ever, about anybody. This is the first time I’ve felt real emotion in a while. I had been numb to everything for such a long time, I had forgotten what it was like to feel things this intensely. 

I lean in and fill the gap between our lips. She makes a soft noise from the back of her throat, and leans into me. I close my eyes and savor the sweetness of her chapstick, and the warmth of her skin. It feels like an explosion of butterflies in my stomach- like nausea, but a good kind. I wrap my arms around her neck and keep kissing her, until I realize I need to breathe so I pull back.

“That felt…” She says, breathlessly. 

“Amazing.” I finish for her. I slowly unwrap my arms from around her and clear my throat. I straighten out my kimono.

“WOOO! Go lesbians!!!” A punk looking girl holding hands with a scared girl with chopped up hair shouts. I burrow my face into my hands, blushing profusely. 

“Yeah!! Right back at ya!” Tenko shouts, her voice giddy with happiness. 

I grab Tenko’s hand and quickly walk towards the center square. She giggles and catches up to my pace.

“Sooo… does that mean we’re, um,” She gets too flustered so I finish for her again.

“Girlfriends…?”

“If you want to be…” She murmurs nervously.

“Yeah. I do.” I say softly. She squeezes my hand with a smile and I squeeze back. 

We spend the night at the festival, watching the performances and sharing a plate of chirashi-zushi, a kind of scattered sushi. We see a few girls from school who we say hi to, but for the most part it’s just me and her. Me and… my girlfriend. Everytime we go to a booth or see someone only she knows, she introduces me as her girlfriend. I act all stubborn and get all blushy, but I actually love when she does that.

We end up going to this cute little purple tent, selling dolls (of course, its Hinamatsuri) but also these little wands, hats, and other ‘magic’ things. I’m looking at all of them in awe when I notice a palm-sized figure of a wolf with a witch’s hat. I look at the tag to see the price. It’s 3000 yen. I only have a 1000 yen bill left that I stole from my dad. I sadly put the wolf back down, but Tenko notices.

“Excuse me, could I get this wolf figure for my girlfriend?” She asks the vendor. She nods and rings it up for her.

“Ah- I can’t pay you back for that Tenko.” I say nervously, eyeing the 3000 yen tag on the wolf. She laughs.

“Don’t worry about it, Himiko. This is my gift to you, as your girlfriend.” She pats my head softly, and it makes me blush for the thousandth time today.

“Thank you!” I say excitedly. The vendor gives me back the wolf, and I eye it happily. It’s perfect! I look at Tenko, who’s smiling. I promise myself to get her something here as well. 

We leave the tent and go to sit down at a picnic bench. Tenko goes to put her arm around my shoulder but shys away at the last second.

She’s too cute. I fight back a smile and snuggle into the side of her body. Her perfume smells like basil and lemon. 

“Ah!” She squeaks out, which makes me giggle. She puts her arm around me more confidently this time and hugs me close. We aren’t talking, but it isn’t awkward or anything, just a comfortable silence. I’m still gripping the wolf wizard in my right hand, smoothing my finger over the ridges of the fur.

“Oh, the streets are starting to empty out.” Tenko glances down at her phone to check the time.

“Shoot! The doll floating is closing soon, we gotta go!” She springs up and grabs my hand. I’m pretty sleepy, so I kind of just let her pull me along. 

Tenko… you’re the piece of my life I never knew I was missing. I had been so miserable for so long, so close to doing the unthinkable. After Tenko and I became friends, those feelings had dimmed, but I still was considering it. But now- I’ve felt nothing but pure euphoria this entire night. I smile to myself and watch her face, worried and sweaty, as we run towards the site for the doll floating.

Now the doll floating has nothing to do with a river, it just was like that in the old days. Nowadays it’s just a display of dolls on a red carpet- many families have their own, but our city has a big one for everyone can go to. You’re just supposed to go and pray for a bit, it’s just custom. 

Suddenly Tenko halts, making me fall forward a bit. She yanks me back before I can completely fall forward.

“Thanks,” I say, steadying myself. I look up at the array of dolls. There are people all around us, praying.

“Should we…?” She asks, gesturing to all the people on their knees with their eyes closed. I nod, and we both get onto our knees, making sure our kimonos don’t touch the ground.

I close my eyes and clasp my hands together. Now i’m not a religious person, but I decide to just thank the universe.

Thank you for Tenko. Thank you for her and the magic that brought us together. I smile and open my eyes a tiny bit, and look over to Tenko. I notice she's looking at me as well. We both blush and look away.

She walks me back home, and when we get to my house, she kisses me on the lips again. I giggle softly and kiss her back.

"Bye, girlfriend." She says with a small wave.

"Bye girlfriend." I wave back.

Shoot, I never got her anything at the festival, I realize. I guess I owe her. I squeeze the wolf mage and tiptoe quietly into the house. My father is asleep on the couch, so I go to my room, stealthily take off my kimono, and change into my pajamas. 

I go to sleep cuddling the wolf figurine close to my heart.


	5. Chapter Five

Trigger Warning for sexual abuse///

I’m eating lunch, cuddling into Tenko’s side. Ever since last week at the Hinamatsuri festival, I don’t think I’ve gone a single day without cuddling or kissing her. She brings me comfort, and although I’m embarrassed to say it, I really do love her. 

“And then I said to him- are you sure YOU’RE the pizza boy?” Kokichi finishes a story. The lunch table laughs uproariously. I wasn’t really listening to the story, but seeing Tenko laugh so brightly brings a smile to my face.

A few new people have joined the once meager table of socially awkward nerds. There’s a girl with shoulder length curly green hair, but I’m not sure what her name is yet. There’s also a friend of Kokichi and Shuichi’s, a really buff boy who has a bit of speech impediment. His name is Gonta, which I know because his impediment is that he talks in 3rd person. 

The weirdest addition to our lunch table is Kaede. I haven’t seen her talk to Kaito since I saw her crying at the playground a week ago. I also haven’t seen her say a word. She kind of just eats her lunch at our table, listening quietly to the rest of the table. Kokichi shoots her angry looks every few minutes to make sure she stays in line.

Tenko reaches down and ruffles my hair. I realize I’m on the verge of falling asleep on her soft arm.

“Hi girlfriend.” She says softly, and kisses me on the nose. 

“Heyyy.” I murmur. She’s so pretty. 

“Get a room, lovebirds.” The green haired girl giggles. Everyone laughs, and I blush and bury my face into her shoulder.

“Whatever, Amami.” Wait. Amami?

The bell rings, and I reluctantly get up from Tenko’s soft embrace. 

While we’re walking to my next class, I ask Tenko about the green haired girl.

“You’re adorable. Her name is Kizuki Amami.”

“Why does Amami sound so familiar…?” I ask her. It’s on the tip of my tongue.

“Ah… her sibling was in Danganronpa 52, you know the one that aired last year. Rantaro Amami, remember? They were the survivor.” My eyes widen.

“Oooh. Right.”

“She doesn’t like talking about it. She moved here a few months ago.” She continues. That’s terrible, her own sibling left her to join a killing game. No wonder her eyes are so baggy and tired. She must be worried sick about her brother.

“It’s strange how Rantaro hasn’t been released yet… I wonder what the Danganronpa Company is planning…” I say quietly. 

I don’t think what Danganronpa is doing is right- teenagers choosing to join a game where multiple people die. But it’s been around for years and years, ever since the first few by the original Junko Enoshima. Years after the tragedy, a company decided to fictionally recreate the games, and from then it dissolved into true murder and death. It’s been over a hundred years since the tragedy, so I don’t think about it much.

“Hey- after school, do you want to come over and watch the new episode of Mage Girls?” I don’t have a TV, so I watch Mage Girls together with Tenko. 

“Sure.” I try to hide my excitement. I love Mage Girls.

Several hours later, I’m sitting on Tenko’s lap on her bean bag. We’re eating oreos, and I can tell Tenko is struggling to eat them. She’s always had a problem eating, especially in front of me. I’m proud of her though, for trying.

Suddenly there’s a knocking at the door of her bedroom. I jump out of her lap and we nod at each other.

“Come in!” 

Her mom enters. She’s a fit lady wearing workout clothes with a towel wrapped around her shoulders.

“Have you seen my…” She trails off, looking down at the oreos package we were eating from.

“Really? Oreos?” She says in an accusatory tone, looking down on Tenko. Uh oh. She wraps her arms defensively over her chest.

“I was just-” Tenko starts, but her mom cuts her off. 

“You don’t need to be eating that, you skipped our workout to hangout with your friend. Look at her. Can’t you be like her?” I pale, glancing down at my skin and bones of a body.

“I-” Tenko’s voice catches, and I can see her face reddening and her eyes watering. Her mom rolls her eyes, and stalks out with an air of self-importance. My shock fades with the slamming of the door, and is quickly replaced with pure rage.

Not even thinking about what I’m doing, I spring up and exit her room. I can hear Tenko asking what I’m doing behind me, but my heart is beating too loud for me to hear her.

I catch up to her mom, and go on my tippy toes to tap her shoulder.

“Mrs.Chabashira, I am small like this because I am poor and am unable to eat healthily. I’m also 4’10. You have NO RIGHT to compare your own daughter to me, when we have completely different bodies. Your daughter is beautiful and I can’t believe you would talk to her in such a way!” I rant, my face going completely red. Mrs.Chabashira widens her eyes, shocked. Before she can react, I go back and grab Tenko’s hand.

“Fuck you! Cmon Tenko.” I give her the middle finger and run down the stairs with Tenko trailing behind me.

“Himiko…” Tenko says once we’re far past her house.

“You-you stood up for me…” She’s crying, her tears streaking down her cheeks. 

“Yeah… your mom was being stupid.” I mutter. I can’t believe I did that. I don’t think I’ve ever been so confrontational.

We sit down on a park bench, our hands still clasped tightly together.

“Y-you know I’ve always been… and you stood up to me…” She says quietly to herself.

“Thank you, Himiko.” Her voice cracks and she smiles. I wipe the tears from her cheeks with a soft smile, and kiss her. She kisses back, and wraps her arms around me tightly. I make a small noise in the back of my throat and lean into her.

When we come apart, I realize two figures are in front of us.

“S-sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt.” A female voice says awkwardly. I look up, confused, to see Shuichi… and Kaede, surprisingly.

“What’s going on?” Tenko wipes the last of the wetness off her face.

“There’s a group of people meeting at Shuichi’s house. We need to speak with both of you.” Kaede says grimly. Shuichi nods with a solemn expression. I’m starting to feel a little nervous. My former bully and the boy who saved me from my other bully are inviting us to a group meeting?

“Why?” Tenko says the question I’ve been wondering.

“We think there is something going on at Sakura Highschool.” Kaede pauses and glances over at Shuichi.

“Something… bad.” Shuichi finishes quietly. It’s the first time I’ve heard him speak since the time he saved me from Kaito.

I look over at Tenko. She looks worried. I grab her hand and squeeze it, and she looks back at me. We have a silent conversation.

“Should we go?”

“I don’t trust Kaede after what she’s done to you and others.”

“I trust Shuichi.” 

“Well, okay. Me too. Try and get some info out of him, I’ll talk to Kaede.”

I nod, and turn back to my confused classmates.

“Okay, lead the way.” 

Shuichi and I are walking in the front, with Kaede and Tenko walking behind us.

“So… what’s all of this about?” I ask Shuichi. He pales.

“I can’t t-tell you yet. Sorry.” I can tell he doesn’t want to talk anymore. I listen to Kaede’s and Tenko’s conversation.

“-target on Himiko?” I stiffen when I hear my name, and it takes energy to not turn around. Shuichi looks at me, and I know he heard it as well. 

“I… I guess she reminds me of myself. A rough home life and not a lot of friends. I guess I kind of took my frustrations out on her. I’m sorry.”

Silence from Tenko for a few seconds.

“Mhm. And why did you stop?” 

“Kaito and I got in a big fight, and he didn’t return to school the next day… After that, I decided to try and get better and be nicer. And then… well, you’ll find out at the meeting.”

“Fine.” They go quiet.

Kaede’s like me… I think of her crying at the playground, and I think of her showering early in the morning in the gross school bathrooms. I think of how her legs are always covered in bruises. I want to turn around, right then and there, and talk to her, figure out what she’s going through at home. Because I know if it’s anything like my home life, then she might be in danger. 

“We’re here. This is Shuichi’s house.” Kaede says loudly. It’s a fairly nice house, with a groomed lawn.

We follow him upstairs, through the organized and clean house. We go to Shuichi’s room. The walls are painted dark blue, and there are a bunch of Danganronpa posters, stuffed animals, and collectibles. It’s a little creepy, to be honest.

There are a bunch of my classmates in the room- people I recognize and people I don’t.

Kokichi is sitting on a beanbag, sipping from a grape soda with a straw. Keebo and Gonta are perched awkwardly on Shuichi’s bed. Miu is lounging on the ground. Kizuki is standing up at the end of the room, pacing back and forth and shuffling around some papers. 

“Alright. That’s everyone, right?” Kaede says. Shuichi sits next to Kokichi, really close to him. I wonder if they’re dating.

“Well, other than Kaito, this is everyone I know so far.” Kizuki answers. Tenko and I sit down on the ground together. Adrenaline is pumping through my body at an alarming rate.

“Okay everybody. My name is Kizuki Amami, if you didn’t already know. You are all gathered here today because something bad is happening at Sakura Highschool. Have any of you gotten any strange letters with the Danganronpa seal on it recently?”

I watch as everyone in the room cautiously raises their hands. Suddenly, I remember last week getting an envelope with the Danganronpa stamp on it. I figured it was a wrong letter, since I don’t watch it, so I had thrown it away. I raise my hand.

“Has anyone opened the letter?” A few people raise their hands- Shuichi, Miu, and Kaede. 

“What did it say?”

Miu answers. “It said… um, that I was being recruited for the new Danganronpa. Danganronpa V3, they called it. I threw it away afterwards of course…” She says that last part unconvincingly, though. 

“This is just what I feared.” Groans Kizuki. She sits down on the window ledge and buries her face in her hands for a few seconds before straightening back up.

“Ran- Um, my sibling, as you know, was in Danganronpa 52. After they won, I was contacted by the company. After I moved to this school, I mean. I thought it was strange how they had only contacted me after I moved, so I hacked into the school’s files. I pulled up student profiles of people who had a history of abuse, mental illness, and other hard backgrounds. Through that, I gathered you all and figured out that the Danganronpa Team is targeting specific people- teenagers who have nothing to lose.” 

My stomach drops, and I’m hit with a wave of nausea. They want me… they want me in a killing game? There’s a moment of silence before the room explodes into commotion.

I can’t do this. I need to- I need to leave. I dash out of the room and run outside the house. 

“Himiko!” Tenko shouts behind me, but I’m running too fast.

A killing game… me… 

I stop running and let the nausea come over me, and throw up into the street.

“Himi-ko…” Tenko catches up to me, panting. She puts a hand on my back, and rubs it until I stop throwing up.

“Hey. Come here. It’s going to be okay.” I hug her tightly, fighting back more nausea and tears.

“You don’t have to do Danganronpa. You’ll be totally safe now. I won’t join the killing game, and neither will you or any of our friends. I promise.” She says softly. I trust her. No death.

No Danganronpa.

“We gotta go back though. Kizuki told me to come back after I get you.” I nod, and grab her hand. I didn’t run too far from the house, just about a block or so. We start walking.

“So… I was talking to Kaede earlier, and Kizuki said she pulled people with bad backgrounds…” I can see where this is going. Shoot, what do I say? I look away from her.

“It’s nothing. My mom died, that’s all.” I say quietly. I mean I wasn’t lying, but I wasn’t telling her everything. If I did, she’d freak out.

“Oh, Himiko, I’m sorry-”

“It’s fine.” I clear my throat nervously.

“What about you? Why did Danganronpa target you?” I ask her. 

“I…” She looks uncomfortable. I guess I shouldn’t have asked that, I mean, I wouldn’t willingly talk about my trauma.

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” I say. We get to Shuichi’s house.

“I was hospitalized a few years ago. I don’t- I don’t really want to say why. I guess they knew through the hospital records.” 

“I’m doing better now, though.” She smiles. We walk up the stairs back to Shuichi’s room.

“Good.” I squeeze her hand. She squeezes back. I used to be hospitalized pretty frequently until I couldn’t afford it anymore, so that’s probably why they contacted me as well. Shivers run up my back. If the Danganronpa team could have seen our hospital records, who knows what else they know?

“Hey, we’re back.” Tenko says. Kizuki sighs in relief.

“Alright, have a seat. You okay Himiko?” I nod. Everyone in the room still looks shell- shocked. Surprisingly, Shuichi looks fairly calm. No- not calm. Empty. Hollow. He’s staring at the Monokuma plush in his hands. Kokichi is sitting next to him, looking uneasy. He seems a bit concerned for Shuichi.

“I was going to say, I think that Kaito may have accepted this letter because he was one of the ones who had a bad background. I’m sorry, Kaede.” Her voice goes kind of soft on the last statement. 

Kaede pales, eyes widening in horror.

“You’re saying… Kaito…”

“He’s going to fucking die?!”

“Stay calm-” Kokichi jumps up.

“No! Fuck this! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!!!” Her eyes are welling up with tears. She starts breathing heavily and curls her hands into fists.

“Kaede-” Gonta tries to put a hand on her shoulder, trying to calm her down. Kaede spins around punches him straight in the face.

“Hey! Don’t touch Gonta like that!” Tenko says, stalking towards Kaede with her hands shaking in fists. Tenko doesn’t generally like men, but she had taken a liking to Gonta, who is kind of a gentle giant. 

“Fuck you!” Kaede swings at Tenko this time, face red and tears threatening to spill down her face.

“No!” I shout, running over, but I’m too slow. Kaede’s fist connects with Tenko’s cheek, making her stumble back.

Something flips in Tenko’s eyes. Her green eyes go cloudy with anger. She raises a fist and punches Kaede back, and soon the two are a flurry of fists connecting with skin. Dazed, I watch in horror as the two fight. Every time Kaede hits Tenko, I wince. Everyone is shouting and trying to pull the two apart, but the two are really going at each other. 

Finally, with Gonta and Keebo pulling Kaede and Miu and Kokichi pulling Tenko, the two are seperated.

“Stop it! We need to work together here, or we’ll all be in trouble! We’ll end up like Kaito!” Kizuki shouts. Kaede shakes her head. I can tell she’s holding back a sob. She has a blooming bruise on her cheek.

“I’ve got to go.” She wrangles out of Keebo’s and Gonta’s grip, and stalks out of Shuichi’s room.

“Same. I… I don’t want a part of this.” Keebo says nervously, tapping his fingers together. They leave. 

“Sorry, Kizuki. Gonta doesn’t need to be making any promises.” He says. What does that mean? I watch him leave.

Miu and Kokichi let go of Tenko. Miu leaves wordlessly. Kokichi goes over to Shuichi, who’s still staring blankly at the ground.

“No…” Kizuki slumps onto the ground, defeated.

“They’re dead… they’re all dead…” She murmurs to herself.

“You guys leave. I’ll take care of them.” Kokichi says sadly. 

“Okay.” Tenko is staring at the ground, hands still balled up in fists, breathing heavily. She has a black eye starting to form, and her nose is bleeding.

“Tenko.” She doesn’t seem to hear me. I grab her bruised hand and pull her out, and she stumbles behind me.

I drag her out of Shuichi’s house. I can’t take her home after what happened with her mom, and I obviously can’t take her to my house. I decide to take her back to the park where we always hang out and meet after school. I take her and sit down with her on the usually park bench we meet at.

“What were you thinking!” I shout. 

“You could have gotten seriously hurt!” I take a tissue out of my pocket and give it to her. She holds it against her nose and tilts her head down.

“I don’t know what came over me… One second she was punching me, and the next I was being pulled away. I guess I didn’t realize how angry I was at her for bullying you until she had provoked me by hitting Gonta.” I’m sitting a few inches away from her, arms crossed across my chest.

“Oh.” I sigh. I don’t know how to feel. She could have gotten seriously hurt! Kaede is a strong girl, even if she doesn’t look like it.

“I’m sorry. This is all just happening so fast.” Tenko says tearfully. 

“It’s okay.” I decide to forgive her, and I scoot over and cuddle up to her.

“It’ll be okay. We’ll be okay.” She sighs into my hug and smiles, wiping her tears.

“We cry a lot.” Tenko laughs. I laugh halfheartedly, and kiss her so I don’t have to keep smiling. 

“I’m gonna go home. Love you.” 

“I love you! See you later girlfriend.”

“Bye girlfriend.” 

As soon as I’m out of her sight, I slump my shoulders and cross my arms. It’s like the cloud that had been gone ever since I started dating Tenko had floated back. The dream is over. I’m being abused at home, the world sucks, and people die. Having a girlfriend won’t change anything.

I’m pretty sure my father is at work, so I slam the front door, throw my school bag into my room, and go to the pantry to make dinner. I went shopping last week, so we are pretty much stocked up for about a week or so.

I grab a can of beans and a tortilla. I start opening the can of beans when I suddenly hear a creaking at the front door. I pale and go to run to my room, but I trip over the table leg and face plant on the floor. 

“Hello Himiko.” My body starts shaking like a leaf, and it’s a struggle to stand up.

“Hello. I need to do schoolwork now.” I say calmly. I leave the kitchen and start walking towards my room.

“Himiko. I’ve had a long day at work.” I freeze. I try not to turn around.

“Won’t you help out your poor old dad?” 

“I have sch-”

“You don’t want to fight me on this.” He sighs. Nausea hits for the second time today. 

You just have to Himiko. You just have to do it. Get it done with.

He’s unbuckling his belt.

I just need to do it.

He’s taking off his shirt.

I just need to get through this. One more time. 

He’s taking off his pants.

Oh god. I can’t do it.

“No…” I whisper. He grabs my by the shoulders and pushes me down onto the couch.

“No… please…”

It’s happening. It’s happening right now.

“NONONONONONO-”

I’m lying there 2 hours later, unable to move. I had to throw up once it was over, but I wasn’t able to get up so I threw up off the side of the couch. It smells terrible, but I still can’t get up. I’m too sore and I don’t have the energy anyways. I’ve also been off and on crying for the two hours as well.

I want to kill myself right now. I want to go to sleep and never wake up again. There’s suddenly a knocking at the door. I want to ignore it, but it’s pretty persistent. 

I slowly stand up, wincing in pain, and I go to sidestep the vomit and other… fluids, and pull on my clothes.

When I open my door, I meet a mailman. 

“Letter for… Himiko Yumeno?” He says. He’s holding a manila envelope, and I realize the Danganronpa seal is on it.

“That’s me.” I sign off for it. On the envelope it says to deliver in person, and ‘VERY IMPORTANT’, yes in all caps. 

Once I leave, I limp back to my room and rip it open.

‘Hello Himiko Yumeno, this is the Danganronpa Team contacting you because we think you would enjoy being in Danganronpa V3, or Danganronpa 53. If we aren’t mistaken, your mom died 5 years ago, and you have been hospitalized 6 times since then. Twice for suicide attempts, 3 times for sexual injury, and once for a broken arm. We think that your life may have increased quality if you joined our killing game- either you don’t have to suffer, or you become rich and don’t have to worry about your current life.’

There’s more information afterwards, but I stop reading from there.

It’s basically saying, join Danganronpa, so you’ll either die or become rich. I go to throw away the letter again, but instead I put the letter on my nightstand and stare at it for a few minutes. 

Die, or escape. I hated the idea of it before, but now…

I flip over in bed.

No. What am I thinking? I can’t join Danganronpa. What about Tenko…? That’s right. I need to stay alive for Tenko. Sweet, caring Tenko who cries easily. I don’t want to think about what she’d do if I joined Danganronpa and died.

I still leave the letter on the night table. Just in case.


	6. Chapter Six

That next monday, when Tenko and I go to eat lunch, our table is completely empty. Kaede is nowhere to be found, Keebo and Miu are at alternate ends of the cafeteria, looking upset. Gonta, Kizuki, and Shuichi don’t seem to be anywhere either, and Kokichi is sitting alone, head buried in his arms.

“Well this is a sorry sight.” Tenko laughs nervously. She runs a hand through her long hair and sighs.

“Want to eat outside by the fountain?” I nod. I’m feeling kind of tired and dizzy, so I don’t feel like talking. I think Tenko picks up on that, because she’s pretty quiet. I run my hand under the clear blue water streaming from the fountain.

“Tenko…” I murmur. 

“Yeah?”

“I’m doing a school project… how do you cope with grief…?” I look at her with hopingly convincing eyes. She frowns.

“What kind of school project is that?”

I quickly think about it. “Nyeh... in english, duh. It’s a psychology project.” 

“Oh! Well… I’ve never had to deal with grief, but I do feel a lot of empathy towards people. I think if someone I was close to died…” She glances at me for a split second.

“I would be really, really sad for a long time. I would eventually move on I suppose, but I would miss them.” She answers nonchalantly.

“Mmm. Me too.” I say, taking a bite of my cheese and bread sandwich. 

Why did I ask that? Is there still some part of me that wants to... 

“You want to go to the library after school?” 

I look at her. She looks tired, like me. I think we both need a distraction from this… troubling situation.

“How about we go downtown and get boba tea? I think there’s some kind of performance going on at the park.” She perks up with a smile.

“That sounds great!” 

After school we meet at our usual spot at the park. We decide to take a taxi downtown. I don’t get to ride in cars a lot, so it’s mesmerizing to watch the buildings and people zoom past in a blur.

“...Did you want to talk about last friday?” Tenko asks quietly. I look over to the taxi driver, but since he’s separated by a glass partition, I doubt he can hear us.

“Not really.” She nods.

“I am worried for the others though. I mean, you saw everyone at lunch today. And Kaito…” Tenko frowns.

“Kaito is a bully and an asshole. He made his own decision.” 

“I heard him talking to Shuichi once. He has something going on at home, I don’t know what, but you shouldn’t charge him so harshly.” I say. She sighs.

“So? We all have problems. That doesn’t mean he has to take it out on other people.”

“Well that doesn’t mean he has to die!” I say loudly. The taxi driver glances back for a second before looking back. Tenko’s face softens.

“Sorry. You’re right.” She ruffles my hair. I sigh.

“Let’s just try and forget about what happened yesterday, okay? At least for a few hours?” I nod.

We eventually arrive downtown, pay the driver, and go to get boba tea. She gets matcha, and I get strawberry.

“Is green your favorite color?” I ask her.

“Yeah, how’d you know?” She laughs, shaking her matcha tea in the air.

“Is your’s pink?” I blush.

“How’d you know??” I gasp. She giggles and pokes my cheek.

“Cuz you’re always blushing.” I pout and sip my tea.

“Hmph. Whatever. Oh, we’re here.” The park downtown is huge. There are blooming cherry blossoms, several fountains, and a huge statue in the middle. The statue is of Junko Enoshima. I feel my face fall as I realize, and I notice Tenko slows down.

“Ah…” We pause at the entrance to the park. I can see the performers getting ready, and there’s a crowd waiting for them to start.

“It’s just a statue, right?” Tenko laughs it off.

“Cmon, I’ll race you there!!” She takes off running, leaving me in the dust.

“Hey, wait up!” I laugh in spite of myself and start running after her. My legs are still sore, but I ignore it and eventually match her pace. I beat her by a fraction of a second to the crowd of people.

“Aw man!”

“Hehe. You cheated and I still won.” I stick out my tongue at her. She rolls her eyes and playfully pushes me.

We push our way to the front of the crowd and sit on the ground with the other younger/shorter people. There’s a black curtain, decorated with stars and a moon. Tenko grabs my hand and squeezes it.

“Excited?” 

“Yeah!” I watch as a group of people come out of the curtain, and the crowd explodes in cheers.

The actual performance is beautiful- it features dancers, decked in long, purple kimonos and fanning gorgeous star- studded fans. 

I’m not really focused on the performance, though. I keep glancing over to Tenko, whose eyes are wide with wonder and her mouth slightly open in amazement. Her slightly too long greenish-black bangs arched almost into her green eyes, and I find myself resisting the urge to brush them out of the way. Or, perhaps, I just want to touch her. 

Before I know it, we’re back in the cab heading home. I’m looking through the window, holding Tenko’s hand of course, when I notice a Danganronpa merchandise ad. I feel my blood run cold. Right. Danganronpa. The thing we’ve been trying to forget.

“Hey… do you want to, I don’t know…” She laughs nervously, waving a hand in the air dismissively. “Come over to my house and spend the night? My parents aren’t home.”

I perk up in excitement.

“I’d love too!!!” I say with a huge smile. I notice she’s staring, so I clear my throat and frown, trying to make myself seem serious.

“I mean… sure, why not.” She starts laughing, which makes me laugh too. 

Once we get to the house, we really out-do ourselves. We steal facemasks from her mom’s bathroom, get fuzzy blankets, pop popcorn, and set up a pillow fort in the living room. The whole time we’re listening to some english songs by some girl named Girl in Red.

“They’re so pretty, it hurts, I’m not talking about boys I’m talking about girls!” Tenko sings. She’s surprisingly good at singing, which makes me flustered. She walks over to me and spins me around, dancing easily to the beat of the music.

“They’re so pretty in their button up shirts!” I giggle as I start dancing with her. We start out slow dancing, my face on her shoulder, but end up jumping around wildly as the songs progress.

We plop down on our makeshift pillow fort, breathless and sweaty. I put my long red hair in a ponytail using a rubberband.

“You know, you’d look cute with short hair, Himiko.” 

“Nyeh?” I finger the tip of my ponytail, scrunching my brow as I imagine myself with short hair.

“You’d look cute too.” I flirt. This makes her blush. 

“Plus you need to trim your bangs.” I put my hand on her forehead and rustle her bangs until they stick up all strange.

“Himikoooo!” She laughs. 

We end up watching this movie Tenko pirated, something about this cheerleader girl falling in love with a nerdy girl. It’s actually pretty cute, and I find myself getting invested in the movie. 

During a kind of slow part of the movie, Tenko kisses me. 

“What was that for?” I ask. She shrugs.

“Why not?” She sticks out her tongue. I roll my eyes and kiss her back- but I find myself not wanting to pull away this time.

She sighs contentedly as we kiss. Our lips moving together in rhythm, coming apart slightly every few seconds to breathe. She reaches her arms around me and pulls me towards her. 

I start to feel a little uncomfortable, but I don’t want to hurt Tenko’s feelings so I continue kissing her. 

She puts a hand on my upper thigh. I freeze. Suddenly I’m not there, in the safety of Tenko’s arms, but instead at home, on the couch. 

Why is he kissing me? He never kisses me. I can’t move, though, because if I move he’ll hurt me even more. I break out into cold sweat and try to stay as still as possible. He stops kissing me.

“You’re going to satisfy me… Himiko…” I hear his voice say. 

“No… please…” I whisper. I know it’s useless, but it’ll at least make me feel better.

“Himiko…” He groans.

“I’m sorry…” 

“HIMIKO!” It’s not him anymore, but it’s a girl’s voice. My eyelids flutter, and I realize my eyes had rolled into the back of my head. I slump forward, but someone is holding me up by the shoulders.

Tenko…? Her face is pale and creased with worry. I glance around the room, suddenly remembering where I am. I must have gotten a flashback of last friday. My stomach hurts.

“Sorry… I must have… UGH!” There’s a sharp pain in my stomach again. Am I starting my period or something? Or is it an unnoticed injury from the other night? I double over and clench my tummy. 

“Are you okay? What’s going on?” The pain subsides. I take a deep breath and put on a happy face. 

“Nothing, just a stomach cramp.” I smile. She still looks concerned.

“Himi-”

“It’s fine.” I say sharply. She looks away sadly. I feel guilty, but what am I supposed to say? 

Sorry, you just reminded me of my father. How could I say that to her? I’m still next to my girlfriend, but I feel a million miles away right now. I look at her pained expression from the corner of my eye. I couldn’t tell her. I couldn’t tell her that she caused a flashback. 

I can’t hurt her. 

But… I sigh. What if this happens again…? What if every time I’m with Tenko now, I get flashbacks like these? 

That’s… I can’t think about that. If this happens again, I don’t even know what’d I do.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Let me know any comments or criticism, please! Also, be sure to check out my wattpad, twitter, and buymeacoffee, my handle also wlwchiaki!


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